#1

Blogging, the unbeatable high.

It shoots your nerves to the sky.

Or was that rioting?

I forget.

Anyways after 3 years of saying how much I hate blogs and how lazy bloggers are, I have decided to start a blog. However, for as hypocritical I am, I will never ever get a Twitter account. Twitter is only a way to post useless narcissistic bullshit in 140 characters or less. The only acceptable use for Twitter is to look at Tweets from people that obviously should not have Twitter:

Sarah Palin (VP candidate):

c tomrrw's Healthcare Takeover vote=the sleeping giant will awaken&action will b takn by"average"Americans as lite shines on big govt growth

Bree Olson (noted pornographer):

Are there any porn sluts here in the valley that wanna come get your pussy fucked by me? I'm in the mood for a pretty lil whore tonight.

FCC (really?):

Chairman Genachowski speaking to tech for families at "Kids@Play"summit at CES.

Anyways I think I'll keep my blog to shit that people will actually care about with the occasional story about my life. For example, people ca

re about naked pictures of Jessica Alba. They don't care if I got the wrong fucking coffee order at Starbucks. Continuing on, Channing Tatum (this guy):

Who starred in just ground-breaking thought provoking films as Fighting and G.I. Joe: Rise of Cobra has brought fail to a 'ho 'notha level. While shooting his new film in Scotland a scene required him to have scalding hot water poured on him while in a wet suit. Somehow the water leaked through the suit and he quote, "pulled the suit away from his body to somehow get away from the scalding water and the more I pulled, the lower the water went." I'm pretty sure if you had boiling water poured on you the last thing you'd want to do is pull the suit away from your body. And once at the hospital, "I had five guys looking at my shriveled, burned penis." Stupid is, as stupid does.

In the latest Avatar news, fans of the movie are now becoming suicidal because apparently they don't want to live in a world that's not as beautiful as Pandora, the planet that the movie takes place in. First of all, if you're become suicidal over a sci-fi movie, I'm not even sure if I want you on my planet in the first place. And secondly if you want to live in a world with blue people and giant trees, take some LSD and watch the Smurfs.

In the world of my life, I have some exciting news. I found my glasses. My thick-rimmed, Buddy Holly-look alike glasses. Now I decided to take a leap of faith and wear them today, and I discovered that half the fucking population of the world now thinks it's awesome to wear these beasts. 4 years ago I was so ashamed of them I purposefully lost them. But now 'nerd-chic' is back and am I jumping on the bandwagon? You bet your ass I am.

Peace.